ENTP💞ENTP
ENTP + ENTP
Introduction
Every relationship holds the potential for conflict and the potential for growth. What sets same-type relationships apart is the possibility of profound mutual understanding, as well as the possibility of going to extremes. Same-type relationships can be remarkably comfortable and supportive. Sameness is a blessing when someone knows you so well that they help you see yourself better. However, same-type relationships can also become a curse of deep dysfunction, if the worst aspects of the personality type are allowed to continue unchecked.
Thus, same-type couples should be vigilant about getting stuck in a rut of unhealthy patterns. They should make a conscious effort to challenge each other and steer themselves in the direction of relationship growth, via addressing the personal problems that hold back that growth. In other words, personal development and relationship health are particularly intertwined in same-type pairings. I will list common problems to look out for in each pairing based on functions. Remember that different people are at different stages of type development (consult the Type Development Guide for more detail). Not everyone will exhibit the same level of dysfunction, and some unhealthy patterns are easier to address than others.
Negative patterns to be aware of:
Unhealthy Ne: chooses the wrong way to change situations and/or pushes change without reflecting on the true costs; misuses creativity to take shortcuts or evade consequences; takes pride in being a rebel or disruptor; irrational need to see oneself as witty, clever, or special
Unhealthy Ti: lacks self-control and self-discipline; lacks consistent and coherent principles for intelligent problem solving; rationalizes away mistakes; unwilling to confront faulty beliefs and negative consequences of actions
Unhealthy Fe: difficulty being firm and resolute without external validation; uses double standards to justify flawed thinking and biased judgment; takes from others while contributing little in return; uses superficial social charms, unfair criticisms/comparisons, or rigged competition to gain false confidence or feel superior
Unhealthy Si: easily bored and takes the good things in life for granted; lack of solid/rooted identity due to devaluing past experience and not owning mistakes; irrational fear of being trapped, tied down, or forced to follow through; becomes unmoored, compulsive, inflexible, or pedantic when extremely stressed/unhappy
Ways to use your functions better:
Ne: always consult with people to gauge their comfort level before pushing for change because you are more likely to succeed when everyone is onboard; remember that it actually hurts your progress when you don’t face up to consequences, so a mature person knows to confront problems head on in order to speed up their learning and progress; make sure you do things for the right reasons because, when you push for change for egotistical reasons, you’re more likely to self-sabotage and run into obstacles; remember that, when you advocate for change that produces tangible benefits for every party, you’ll have real reason to feel proud
Ti: ask yourself and your partner whether something is a good idea before diving in; improve your critical thinking skills so that you approach problems with a fair and impartial mindset that is accepting of the facts and responsive to logic; take responsibility for bad judgment because it is necessary for getting smarter and preventing mistakes from happening again; if you have caused hurt/harm, even if unintentionally, apologize sincerely so that you can both move on
Fe: while it is good to hear people out and get more perspective, you have to make the decision you think is best, and it’s easier to do that when you’re willing to bear full responsibility for it; understand that real self-assurance comes from mastery, not from social comparison or praise, so put more time into improving your knowledge and skills properly and heed constructive criticism; understand that real self-esteem comes from knowing that your existence has value, so contribute your talents to others and they will have a legitimate reason to respect and appreciate you
Si: remember to appreciate and hold on to all the things in your life that have helped, supported, or enabled your progress; own and feel at peace with past mistakes by learning from them and understanding that they were necessary for you to become a better person; remember that if you’re constantly moving to greener pastures, you’ll never leave yourself enough time to truly enjoy your achievements; whenever you get fixated on things that make you unhappy, get back in touch with the person you hope to be, set some purposeful goals, and get back into living life